12 weeks

12 WEEKS!!! Today the little life is 12 weeks along. For some reason, in my mind this is a big milestone. It makes me happy to be able to say, "Yes, I'm 12 weeks along".

I'm feeling better today. Yesterday, not so much. So, we will see. Maybe this is the beginning of the end of all that.

I've begun my day care search. It seems like really early to be doing that, but what I'm hearing from actual day cares is that their wait lists are miles long and that there is no such thing as "too early". My feelings on this issue is that I would really really like to bring the baby to work with me until March 1st of 2009 and then I would like to keep the baby at an in home place until 2 years of age. Then I would like to switch to a day care/pre school. You know, in my perfect world. So, I got on my states child whatever website and got a list of certified or licensed home child care givers and I stalked them yesterday after work. Literally. I got all of their addresses. I mapped out my route and I went and looked at their houses. I figure that I weeded out about four of the candidates just by looking at their house. It was interesting.

So, I'm going to call those ladies and I'm going to call several day cares as well. Because, well, I just don't know if I can leave my baby with someone that I don't know. NOT that I know the day care but it's just different.

My penchant for in home child care (in their home, not my home) stems from my own childhood. I went to this lady's house and I still idolize this woman to this day. I loved her, my mother loved her. There was no germy day care. No run of the mill teacher. Just a few kids in a ladies house who really enjoyed watching children. She used to dress us up, fix my hair, make our halloween costumes. I wish that I could find that for our baby. I'm being realistic though. This is not the same day and time as 26 years ago. Times change. I just don't think that I'm going to find it. I really don't even know if we can afford an in home person.

I'm scared to make these phone calls. I'm such a pansy. Seriously. I'm nervous about it. I just figure, though, that if someone is snotty to me then I will just cross them off of my list. I'm not going to deal with snotty when it comes to my child. That's right. Oh...SNAP!

11-ish weeks

Last Friday I had another appointment. I was a little over 11 weeks along and the doctor couldn't get the heartbeat with the doppler. Of course, I freaked out. The time between her telling me that and the ultrasound that followed seemed to be suspended in space. Like I didn't breathe for that entire time. My mind was racing. My heart was pumping. I will be eternally grateful that my mother was there with me. I stayed calm because of her. The ultrasound tech found the baby right away, heartbeat 164. I could breath again. Everything looked great and we got a new picture. I was bawling. She told me that my uterus is tilted toward my back and that because of this we wouldn't be able to hear the heartbeat with the doppler this early. Wow. Nothing like that situation to make you realize how much you already love this child. This little person growing inside of you. Amazing.

So, my next appointment is at 15 weeks and then 19 weeks will be the big deal, hold your breath scan. I can't even imagine my emotions on that day. Praying for a healthy report, anxious to hear boy or girl. So many mixed emotions on that day. I'm just glad that I have it to look forward to. SUCH a blessing.

Other than that I lost another 4 lbs (I'm down 17 lbs from Day 1 of pregnancy). My bp was fine. I have a urinary tract infection. I have never had one of those in my entire life. I have no symptoms, but it's there so it looks like there will be more medicine for me for the next week. Woohoo.

In the land of baby sugars mine seem pretty ok. Last week I only had one that was out of whack and that was courtesy of a nice big Chipotle burrito. Bad Jen...bad bad girl. It's just that my doctor says don't loose anymore weight well, I can't gain weight and eat the recommended amount of carbs. So, for one meal I splurged. poo on you. I will probably get chewed out for it. I'M TRYING HERE PEOPLE!!!

So, now that I'm almost 12 weeks...I'm really excited. I feel like I can embrace planning for the baby. Looking for furniture, touring different day cares, investing in this baby. INVESTING. Big word, lots of meaning.

Here Still...

I just haven't been posting much because I haven't felt like it. I'm still feeling pretty badly. My Doctor gave me some medicine and it works some of the time, but not all. I'm almost 11 weeks and I'm just praying that this ends soon. It really effects me when I'm at work. It's like my body knows when I get up on a weekday that I'm going to work and it should feel bad and ruin my day. I honestly think that it has some to do with working on the computer and reading, etc. I don't know. It's becoming obvious that I'm just not one of those women that deals well with pregnancy. I'm just hoping that things don't get worse and I'm hoping for a third quarter rally during the third trimester that brings the baby safely into our arms in October.

On the positive side of things, I've lost 12 lbs and my blood sugars are good as is my blood pressure. I'm sincerely hoping that all of that stays that way.

I feel blessed beyond measure to be carrying this baby inside of me. It is still surreal. My life has changed so much in the past 11 weeks. It is an amazing feeling. I go to the doctor Friday and hopefully we will be able to hear the heartbeat with a doppler. If everything is ok then I'm going to start to move forward with more baby planning fun.

That's all I've got for now. I'm just here...hoping and praying.

Weekend Wrap up

Lens Vesicle, Nasal Pit, Hand Plate Begin
•••••
SIZE: 11.0 - 14.0 mmTIME PERIOD: 44 - 48 days post-ovulation

Head and NeckNerve plexuses (network of intersecting nerves) begin to develop in the region of the scalp. Eyes are pigmented and eyelids begin to develop and may fold.
Thorax - Within the heart, the trunk of the pulmonary artery separates from the trunk of the aorta. Nipples appear on the chest. Body appears more like a cube. Abdomen - Kidneys begin to produce urine for the first time.
Pelvis - Genital tubercle, urogenital membrane and anal membrane appear.
Limbs - The critical period of arm development ends, and the arms are at their proper location, roughly proportional to the embryo. However, the hand plates are not finished, but develop further in the next two days. The wrist is clearly visible and the hands already have ridges or notches indicating the future separation of the fingers and the thumbs.
Spine - Ossification of the skeleton begins.

This past weekend was a very busy, but wonderful. Saturday I was able to see many of my best friends as we gave a baby shower for another of our friends. Our shower went off without a hitch and a great time was had by all. Later that night we went out to dinner for another girls birthday. I don't get to spend nearly enough time with these girls since most of us live in different cities. I really cherish every moment that I get with them. They are the best! Sunday we celebrated my grandmother's 79th birthday. She's such a great woman and we just spent the afternoon visiting and catching up with everyone. It was nice.

BTW, Saturday myself and a friend of mine who is about 22 weeks pregnant ventured off to Po.ttery Barn Kids. She finished buying a few things for her son's nursery while I drooled. They have a crib in there that I would LOVE to have. Of course it's like a million dollars but still! They really have some beautiful stuff. It got me really excited to decorate!